I was thinking about spirals today and how life seems to go in cycles like a spiral circling around and around. If you don’t learn the lesson the first time, wait for it, the universe will present it to you again in a slightly different manner. Isn’t that wonderful? What a nice universe. So pay attention or you get to repeat your relationships problems, family issues, money troubles and anything else you struggle with over and over again until you get the message and learn the lesson.
I was having a conversation with someone a few years ago and they were complaining about their relationships and wondering why women treated them this way. Two failed marriages (didn’t learn the lesson the first time) and they were trying to figure out what was wrong. Being the sympathetic type I asked him what was the only thing that those two relationships had in common. He didn’t know so I pointed it out, the only thing they had in common was him! It did not go well for a moment, then the light went on and he started laughing. I think that as long as we believe the problem originates with someone other than us, we will not learn the lesson and are destined to have the same issues repeatedly. We pick the same type of person or we keep doing the same thing and expect different results.
Granted, most of us seem to be drawn to a type, but why? What makes us gravitate towards a certain physical or personality type when we look for someone to have a relationship with. We place a lot of limits on the criteria for our choices. You pick the strong and silent type only to end up resenting them because they don’t talk to you. You picked them! You picked that person so you could continue playing out the drama and learn the lesson. Once you learn the lesson you have some choices. You can chose to stay in that relationship, hopefully you have both grown and can maintain that, or you can let go, cut your losses and stop torturing each other. Some relationships are built on a strong foundation and can withstand the pressures of individual growth, which can lead to mutual growth. So they picked you and you picked them and you both had reasons for doing so. It is so simple and yet so complicated at the same time.
Do you have a type? Do you pick the same person over and over again? Do you have the same issues in every relationship? You, yes you, are the key. It is not about them, it is about you, your choices and your willingness to learn and grow. I didn’t mean to pick on relationships specifically. This can be applied to any area of your life that causes you to struggle. Notice the cycles, the spirals of your life. Look at yourself and discover why you do the things you do. It’s uncomfortable and hard at first but once you can get honest with yourself there is no turning back. Once the knowledge is there you cannot unknow it. That knowledge brings with it a responsibility to act upon it and do things differently. A wise friend of mine often reminds me that there are no mistakes, just opportunities for learning and growth.
Love to you all