Look for the Signs

Okay this is ridiculous, for the fourth morning in a row and I am getting out of bed at 4:44 am on the dot. Alfred Hitchcock also popped into my mind again just before I got up. What the hell is going on?

Shawn’s Dad, we call him Pops, has been visiting for the last few months. He had a farm in Saskatchewan and raised 100 head of cattle. We also have a Scottish Highland cow named Oatsie here, who is more like a pet at this point. Oatsie is 17 years old and an escape artist. Now picture a 1500 pound cow with horns about five feet wide with long hair and huge eyes. The other day we were moving some equipment and had the gate open and Pops was watching the gate. The next thing you know Oatsie is heading down the driveway, she just sailed right by Pops. Everyone was laughing cause this huge cow snuck right past the former cattle farmer kicking up her heels as she went. One of the guys enticed her back in with a bucket of grain and the drama was over. We live right next to the highway so keeping her behind the fence is important. Never a dull day here!

Okay lets go back to Alfred Hitchcock. I have told this story before, so for those who have read it you can skip this paragraph. My friend Debra is a wonderfully funny warm woman who happens to also be a medium. We were talking on the phone one evening and Alfred Hitchcock appeared to her on the ceiling of her living room. I said something like, ooh what does Alfred have to say to you. She started laughing and said he wants to talk to you not me. He said I need to keep writing, but I need to make stuff up. He had a bit more than that to say but I cannot remember what it was. I have not written much since and I am laughing as I type this. So now I am waking up at 4:44 every morning and Alfred Hitchcock keeps popping into my head. I am also writing once again. Thanks Alfred now let me get some sleep.

I have some intuitive abilities myself and have been able to see and get information from people who have passed away, but I would not consider myself a medium in any way shape or form. My information comes more frequently from the animal kingdom and the unusual number of coincidences that happen in my life on a daily basis. I stopped by a friends store the other day and when I went outside to get something from my car there was an SUV parked right in front of the store. On the back window was business information and the name of her business. I also write blog articles under the name Miss Daisy, which happens to be Shawn’s nickname for me. I still don’t understand why he calls me this. So the sign in her window says Driving Miss Daisy in big green letters. We had just watched the last half of the movie with the same name the night before.  I also pulled an oracle or tarot card while I was at my friends shop and the card had a picture of a woman surrounded by butterflies and halos of colour with a gold light seeming to extend from her third eye area into the heavens and said the word wants to be written. I went to a tile store yesterday and ran into a woman who worked there.  We have never met before but when I asked her what her name was she said Kristey and asked if I was Donna.  I thought perhaps my friend who recommended this tile store told her I was coming in but it just so happens we are friends on Facebook and she reads this blog.  The universe is constantly trying to get our attention and send us messages we just have to pay attention. Some may say that these things have no meaning and that is okay.  But, they have meaning for me.

There seems to be an increase in the number of people seeing triple numbers constantly on licence plates, the clock, sales receipts etc etc.  In fact there are entire websites devoted to the interpretation of these numbers.  Some call them angel numbers while others call it numerology.  To me it doesn’t matter what you call it and for some reason when they call them angel numbers it makes me snort silently in my head.  So I looked up the number 444 and read about it as pure numerology and the angel number interpretation.  They all basically say the same thing with or without the angels.  I will use the term universe instead.  The universe is sending a sign that all is well and the universe is supporting you on this journey in any way possible and to continue to work on your goals and those things you are passionate about.  You are on the right path you just have to trust in the process.

Do any of you see repeating patterns whether it is words, numbers, animals or symbols?Drop me a note and let me know what this means for you!  In the meantime,  I have a few fictional stories running through my head so I will try to make some stuff up as Mr Hitchcock suggested.  The characters in these stories are calling out for my attention.  Who knows,  perhaps I will write a book or a few short stories.

Hope you all have a wonder filled day
Look for the signs!!!

Donna

Spirit Says

Well this morning I decided to change things up and sit in my slightly soiled chair once again.  It definitely gives me a different perspective on the room .  I even grabbed a different coffee mug out of the cupboard and my coffee is steaming away in a mug created by a local artist that has a woman and a white raven on it.  Sometimes I feel the need to change things and other times the comfort of routine and familiarity is what I crave. That commercial jingle “sometimes I feel like a nut, sometimes I don’t”, keeps running through my mind.  I realize I talk about living with heart a lot and today will be no exception.  Spirit tells me that they cannot emphasize how important us living from our heart is and that the world needs as many heart centered people as it can get.    Keep writing, spirit says, talk about the heart spirit says.  Fine, fine I will do it but people are going to get tired of it very quickly.

So what is all this heart based writing about?  If you look back over history we have done some horrible things to each other, animals and the planet.  Most of these acts come from a place of fear, the need for power over, plain old greed and ego.  We cannot continue to behave in the same way and expect different results.  Something has to change.  While there have always been people doing great selfless things, I think the numbers are swelling. The media is focused on feeding the fears and the feel good stories are few and far between.  The internet and social media have given some a platform for policing and reporting on the actions of others.  They see someone doing something they don’t agree with and snap a picture and post it to Facebook.  I noticed the other day someone had taken a picture of the back of someones car and called them out for throwing a cigarette butt out of their window.  Stupid thing to do definitely, but did the person snapping the picture stop and deal with the cigarette butt or just go on a rant about it.  This type of calling someone out makes me uncomfortable though I am not sure why.  Brings to mind police state, witch trials, and lynch mobs I guess.  This makes me nervous.  What does this have to do with heart centered living?  Absolutely nothing, isn’t that great!

It doesn’t have anything to do with the heart.  It is all about right and wrong, us and them etc etc.  There is even a local page dedicated to calling out people who park without regard for others.  Why would someone spend so much of their time on a page like this?  I would like to have a coffee and a chat with them to see what lies underneath the need to out bad parkers in a public form.  I had someone come into my shop and she had some psychic abilities.  She looked at me and said there is nothing but fear stopping you.  I was a little offended and curious at the time.  Then she reached out and touched me which made me extremely uncomfortable ( I don’t like strangers touching me) and said, “They can’t kill you this time.”  I completely forgot about her hand on my arm  and almost danced for joy because she woke something up in me with that statement.  I thought, you are right it is not easy for them to kill me for my beliefs this time.  It was like a great weight was lifted off of my shoulders.  I was free to be me.

So I talk about spirit, the universe, animals, symbols, plants and energy healing.  At one point in our history that would have gotten me burned at the stake.  In this day and age you would think people would not have the same fears but those who were persecuted and the people who persecuted them have passed down their beliefs and their DNA to their descendants and depending on your belief system some have carried the echoes of these things into the life that they are in now.  I remember some of my past lives and I was usually the persecuted one because I have always been a healer in some capacity or another.  In this life some people still react with fear.  They are afraid I can see the things they try to hide from others and they are right sometimes I can.  So could anyone else that observes people on a regular basis and reads their body language and watches how they interact with others.  That does not take psychic abilities.

I see what motivates people, the essence of who they are, spirit animals and I now see (this is a new thing) some of the people in their lives who are no longer with us.  I say I see, but that is not an accurate description.  I feel them and am unable to explain it any better than that.  I get feelings and just know certain things.  Right now there is a spirit hovering over my left shoulder reading as I am writing.  I cannot see her but I know she is female and believe this is my maternal Grandmother.  She just turned to me and smiled when I typed grandmother.  For some reason she is very excited about what I am writing, maybe interested is a better word.  I come from a line of people who had strong intuitive abilities and perhaps my Grandmother was one of them she is nodding her head and has her hands clasped together.  I know that my mother used to see people who had crossed over but she was not comfortable with it and never spoke about it.  Thanks Grandma!

What does all this have to do with living a heart entered life?  I know, sometimes it takes me a while to get to the point  We all have gifts or talents, whatever you want to call them.  If you are coming from a place of love or with heart those talents are of great service to the entire planet and all its inhabitants. If you don’t know what your talents are look to your heart.  It will almost burst with joy when you find it.  What makes your soul light up?  Find that.  Do that, even if you don’t think you are ready.  I was having a bit of a rebellious streak and told spirit they could wait until I was damn ready to write.  They told me that was fine, I was only wasting my own time!  So much for the rebellion.  I hope that the person with the parking page realizes that their talents and time are wasted on  that and they have far more to contribute.  I hope they discover their gifts because what they are doing is not far off the mark.  They just need to shift their time and focus to something other than badly parked cars.

So stop avoiding your talent or gift and stop focusing on what others may or may not be doing.  Look for the things that make your soul light up, that is what we are supposed to contribute to the world.  Sometimes it is the smallest talent that has the most impact so do not discount it even if it seems odd or tiny in comparison with others.  Stop comparing and just be you.  You are enough and you were born to do this.  Go out there and spread some love today.

Okay, I went outside for a moment before I hit the publish button and had two strange experiences.  I was wishing that my writing skills were better than they are and that I was more eloquent.  Spirit said enough of that.  Spirit wants you to know that the fears are constructed by your mind and wants me to remind you that your heart is fearless.  So live fearlessly and follow your heart.  I also encountered a male spirit who was distraught.  He was pacing up and down the path and muttering to himself so I asked him what was wrong.  He said, “I lost it, I lost it all!”  Don’t ask me how I know but he was swindled out of all his money and felt ashamed and did not want to go home and face his family.  We had a quick discussion and by the end of it he had a huge smile on his face and waved goodbye as I stood on the path with tears streaming down my face because once again I got to witness the power of love and compassion.  What a wonderful way to start the day.

 

Much love and many hugs to all

Donna

The Heart Knows

I woke up yesterday morning with a new energy and renewed spirit. This was a much welcomed change. I haven’t been feeling down the last few weeks, it was more of a flat feeling if that makes any sense. So, I have been pondering this change in my energy and trying to uncover what it is. What is at the root of it. I would have to say that it stems from my heart. What is really interesting is that it spreads out and touches the people I come in contact with. You know that saying smile and the whole world smiles with you? Well, it is true. If you live from your heart people cannot help but respond to you from theirs. It is contagious in a good way. Sure there are still some people who do not seem to have a heart to respond with but it is in there. It may be hardened and dried up a little but love them anyway. One thing I have a gift for is cracking the tough shell of cranky old men and old women for that matter. I love the cranky ones and always have. When I worked in a nursing home my coworkers would ask me why a certain patient was so nice to me and so mean to everyone else. I told them it was because I loved them and they knew it! On some level people can see through the bullshit and know who has a heart and isn’t afraid to use it.
I just had a flashback to a vision I had about my life when I was a child. I will just say that my relationship with my Mom was not an easy one, she was hard to love. The universe gave me the opportunity to look at all the interactions I had with my Mom and how different things could have been for her if I had responded to her with love instead of through my fears. I was also shown how different things would have been for me. Until you learn the lesson the universe keeps putting the same issues in front of you until you deal with it. The people may change and the situation my change but it is the same issue over and over. Since I chose to respond to people from my heart instead of my head, that dark space where the fear lurks, life has changed dramatically. Do I still have fears? Oh yeah baby I still have fears, I am merely human. But I have chosen to respond with love despite my fears and insecurities.
When we tell ourselves things like, I always have trouble expressing myself or I will never get along with my brother, we are reinforcing that idea. Someone told me to change the way I said things and I would start to notice changes. What I did was put the words in the past in front of these statements. In the past I never got along with my brother. This leaves the future open to a different outcome. So regardless of what you have struggled with in the past that is where it belongs, do not let your past experiences dictate the future. That small change in the way I spoke had a huge impact. I now try to choose my words more carefully. The answer to all of our troubles is always inside us. Someone I know was talking about his disastrous relationships. Two failed marriages were weighing on his heart and mind. I kindly pointed out that the only thing all of his relationships had in common was him. Then we both burst out laughing! When I realized that I had the solutions to any problem inside my own heart and accepted ownership of the issue and the solution my entire perspective changed. I make it sound easy, but it was not. It took a lot of work both internal and external. Fortunately the universe kept testing my new found skills and helped me hone them. Do I love everyone? No I do not, I treat them with kindness and compassion but I do not give them much time or waste my energy on them. I do say a little prayer for them though.
I have someone in my life who I really enjoy spending time with. I am out of my comfort zone sometimes with this person, but I do not let that stop me from getting to know them or interacting with them heart wide open. The world is a better place because they are in it and they make my soul want to dance. I enjoy them for who they are at this moment and all their little quirks and idiosyncrasies. I have fears, but will be damned if I am going to let them dictate this relationship or any other one. My past is not going to colour the future. I have wiped the slate clean and the future is only full of possibilities. Perhaps it is easy for me to do this because the life I had ended abruptly. I am not sure. All I know is that I take each day as it comes and try to deal with any issues as they come up. I have the answers inside my heart. What do you want out of a relationship? Do you want acceptance? Then give that to the other person. Whatever it is that you want, that is what you have to give. Simple isn’t it? 
I stopped for a minute to refill my coffee and had a vision of my heart. When you think of someone’s heart the colour red comes to mind for most of us. Well, I will tell you a secret, the colour of my heart is blue. It is a calm peaceful blue like a clean clear ocean warmed by the summer sun. It is liquid like the ocean too, the colours change in depth and swirl and shift and swell. Can you see it? Can you feel it? Well, my warm blue heart wishes you a love filled day and please don’t let fear stop you from having the life and relationships you want to have. Get out there and open your heart to the world. I promise you will not regret it!

Much love to all

Donna

Temporary Ghost

Sometimes lately I feel like a ghost wandering around and most people cannot really see me. Some days I feel as though I am barely alive. I wonder if the people in my life know how much sadness is hidden inside me. I wonder if they can see how much I have to give and the amount of love I have for them. I wonder if they know how much I want to feel alive and loved. I wonder about many things but I never ask the questions. I just want people to see me, not their idea of who they think I should be. I do not need them to fix me. I am not broken. I think we all want people to love and accept us just the way we are. I don’t think it is too much to ask for. Most people can’t see beyond the picky little shit they place so much importance on to the heart and soul of the person standing in front of them. We see a distorted view of the person in front of us based on our own wants, needs and particular view of the world and our place in it.

I almost deleted the first paragraph but decided to keep it. It is honest and possibly makes me vulnerable but I don’t think either of those things is necessarily bad. I have realized that the thing that is really bothering me is how temporary everything in my life is at the moment. As long as I focus on the present moment I am fine, the minute I start thinking about the future my chest tightens and I get agitated. The universe seems to be giving me a lesson in staying in the present and I am not enjoying it yet. When it comes right down to it everything, and I mean everything, is temporary and life changes from moment to moment. So why does it bother me?

Perhaps it is because I have had so many changes take place in the last year that I am not the same person. I have a different view of the world based on my experiences and I have not been impressed with some of the things I have discovered about others and myself. I would like to have some consistency in my life. I would like to make some decisions about my future but seem unable to do so. I thought the problem was having too many options. Apparently, that is not true. I am unable at this point to take part in anything that does not bring me joy and speak to my soul. I need to discover what those things are again. I knew what they were at some point, I gave them up, for what seemed like good reasons at the time and that is when I stopped living and started merely existing. No wonder I feel barely alive some days.

So, I know what has brought me joy in the last few years and need to find a way to incorporate more of that into the new life I have now. I know the universe will guide me and I have great faith that this new path will be beyond my wildest dreams. I just have to remain open to the possibilities and have some patience with the universe and myself.

Peace and love to all
Hug everyone

Donna

Curves and Chrome

Did you know that I like old cars and trucks? I saw this beautiful blue Chevy truck yesterday with a split windshield from the late forties or early fifties. I hung around for a bit to see if the owner would show up so I could talk to him or her, never assume a vintage vehicle is owned by a man. I am still not used to technology and forgot to take a picture of it. I fell in love with the truck and wanted to buy this truck. Now I need another vehicle like I need a hole in my head but this truck spoke to my soul. The lines and the grill were simple yet beautiful and the stance was solid reminding me of a mountain gorilla. I like all the curves and small details the older vehicles have, they are art on wheels. I don’t care about fancy paint jobs! I like the weathered look on cars just like I do on men. The older vehicles are interesting and older men are interesting. Ooh I am starting to see a connection here. What appeals to me about the old cars is the same thing that appeals to me about people.

My daily driver is a Subaru Crosstrek and if you stand and look at the front it looks like an angry bird of some sort. Most of the newer vehicles look angry, weird huh. The world is also full of angry stressed out people. The new cars are all sharp angles and seemingly pointless curves designed to make them more aerodynamic. Not so much rolling art, but rolling science. I have had enough science. Everyday someone comes out with a new scientific study saying don’t eat this, don’t do that, blah blah blah. What the hell has happened to us? We are so bombarded with scientific information it can be a little overwhelming. I have had my new car for four months and there is so much technology I still haven’t figured out how all of it works. At one time I would have read the manual before I drove it, not at this point in my life. I would fall asleep from boredom in about two minutes. Ooh perhaps I just found a cure for insomnia!

I like things that are unique and I like people that are uniques as well. Show me someone who dances to the beat of their own drum and we are sure to be great friends in minutes. I appreciate authenticity, honesty, verbal banter, teasing, playfulness, and individuality. The vintage car people seem to have a culture all their own and I really enjoy the car owners that appreciate an old car regardless of the money spent restoring it. I like the old clunkers without the pristine paint and interiors and I usually like the people who own them. Guess I am that way myself, no fancy paint and a little weatherbeaten. I don’t enjoy car snobs anymore than I enjoy snooty people. We all have to use the bathroom and wipe our own bums! Well unless you have a bidet then that takes things to a different level.

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When I get behind the wheel of my 51 Caddy I feel different. I love driving this car!  This car was heavily customized and I really wanted air bags so I could sit Lola on the ground but had to settle for lowering her nine inches. The boys in the low rider club said she just wasn’t low enough to be part of the club damn it. I have had so much fun with this Caddy and have met some wonderful people when I take her out for a drive. I just don’t plan a short trip anywhere. Even just stopping to gas up can take an hour or more. People want to know about the car and I had to learn how to not be self conscious when complete strangers come up to me and start asking questions. Because she has no roof at all I can hear the things people say when I drive past them. Now this car has curves and chrome and reminds me of a fat bottomed woman. I always check out cars rear ends and I am always checking out men’s rear ends! I have a thing for bums apparently. I fell in love with her the moment I saw her. The picture at the top is what she looked like before Howard performed his magic on her.
I guess my love of old cars is related to my yearning for simpler times and my love of simple people. Life is complicated and I don’t need complicated relationships or people in it. Don’t dismiss an old rat rod because it doesn’t have the shiny paint or the bling. Don’t dismiss people that don’t fancy it up either. You never know what they have hidden under the hood or inside their heart.
Hug everyone
Spread some joy

Donna

Once again I am sitting in the dark listening to the coffee perk and waiting for the sun to come up. I would really like to know why I could barely drag my butt out of bed to go to work in the past and now am wide awake at 5 am every day when not working. Perhaps I am excited to find out what the day has in store for me? Well it is Friday and that means the septic system is being pumped out, Neil the handyman will be here to do a garbage run and my life is full of running up and downstairs with boxes, boxes and more boxes. That is not all that exciting. However, you just never know what little gems are hiding in amongst the seemingly mundane daily chores. I found my favourite pair of glasses that I misplaced for a week in the laundry hamper so that is a bonus!

Some days there is so much to do that I get overwhelmed and have trouble getting started. The key is to just start! Pick up a box and put it in the car. That works well for any situation when you don’t know where to start. Pick one thing and start there. What you pick doesn’t matter it is the forward momentum that matters. I envy those people who are just able to really dig in to any task without analyzing it to death. I think about things so much that sometimes I think I have actually done them, but no. I just need to let go off my mind and do it. So, write, drink my coffee and get packing!

Music, don’t forget, everything is better with music! I have music on my iPod for every possible mood and occasion! Gregorian monk chants, B. B. King, rock, classical, blues and pop to name a few. I love music and can actually feel the notes floating out of the speaker and changing the air in the room! This morning as I write I am listening to Ajeet Kaur’s cd “At the Temple Door.” Beautiful voice and music that makes my heart burst open with love. Ajeet’s music is great for the bedroom too! I started laughing when I said that but it is true, it is great music for sleeping and other things.

So this will be a short post today since there is so much to do. I want to remind you of a few things before I shut the computer off.
You are enough
The universe loves you
Be brave
Hug people
Hug yourself
Breathe
Make time for the important things
Be present for the people you love
What others think is none of your business
Have a wonderful day
Smile with your heart
Live like you mean it
Love like you mean it
Just spread some love
Be curious, don’t lose that ever!

peace and love to you all

Donna

Coffee and a Turtle

Once again it is five am, the coffee is filling the house with its dark and earthy aroma, the fire is going and I am sitting in my slightly soiled chair, thinking about silly things and contemplating my life. I was shopping yesterday afternoon for a few things for my new place. I got to the coffee section and was overwhelmed with the number of choices. How am I supposed to pick one without being a coffee expert?   I like coffee, medium roast to be exact, but even the choices of medium roast numbered over 20. An entire section of shelving filled with colourful packages and the brand I like wasn’t on the shelf. Great another trip to another store! I order Americano at the local coffee shop where it has the catchy name of V0S 1N0, which used to be the local postal code. Now I wasn’t sure how to pronounce that so I ordered a medium postal code but this threw the baristas off so they told me to order an Americano. Even ordering a cup of coffee can be complicated. I don’t visit Starbucks often but when I do I always think up a new name for them to put on my cup, to see if they can spell it or just to see if they are really listening. Last week my name was Aradia, which is Greek for the goddess of witches. A girl has to have some fun even when ordering coffee.

I don’t like complicated things. They make my head hurt. I don’t have time for complicated relationships, IKEA furniture with its twelve page instruction sheet for a small table, or a morning facial routine that contains five products and fifteen steps to a more youthful glow. I am the wash, tone and moisturize girl. No muss and no fuss, that is who I am. Now that is not to say that I do not make things more complicated than they need to be, especially when I don’t think things through beforehand. Sometimes just jumping in with no forethought can complicate the hell out of my life. I don’t always think about the small numerous details. I decided to move before I sold my house. Simple right? Wrong, there are insurance issues, which require me to sleep in my old house four nights a week or it is considered vacant and the insurance doesn’t cover a multitude of important things. I also need two of almost everything if I am going to live in two places. Didn’t really think that through before I signed the lease. All I knew was that I felt like I couldn’t breathe living in the house with everything that has happened and I could not move on with my life until I lived somewhere else. So I found a new place to live and didn’t think about all the small details. The woman who is allergic to complications just complicated the hell out of her own life.

The other thing I am thinking about is synchronicity. According to Wikipedia, synchronicity is a concept, first explained by psychiatrist Carl Jung, which holds that events are “meaningful coincidences” if they occur with no causal relationship, yet seem to be meaningfully related. Life is full of it, at least it is for me. Sometimes I do not recognize it until after the fact, but it happens. I was heading to my new place the other day to wait for deliveries and when I got there a turtle was blocking the driveway. I have lived on this island for over twenty years, have four ponds and have never seen a turtle, so this got my attention. So I park my car and approach the turtle wondering what to do. As I pick him up his head and limbs retract into his shell and he produces a loud hissing noise. I had no idea that turtles hissed! He was not as heavy as I expected either. So I moved him onto the grass and parked in the driveway. Every time I went outside I checked on him and on my last trip he was gone.   He hadn’t moved more than a foot in an hour and then in ten minutes he had completely disappeared and I looked for him in a ten foot radius of where I had left him.

So I thanked the universe for my turtle encounter and contemplated what message the turtle had for me. The first things that came to mind were, slow and steady and home is where your heart is. The universe has been slowing me down in many ways for months and this was one more way to get its point across, and a rather obvious one. That’s the nice thing about life if you don’t get the message the first time it gets presented in a number of ways until you do. So, it also doesn’t matter where I live, I am the home for my soul and a house is not my home. When I viewed this suite the first thing I noticed about it was I felt centred and grounded so I am taking the turtle as a sign that this new place will be good for me. The universe knows that I pay close attention to the animals so what better way for it to welcome me to my new place and send a message than to put an animal in my path. Thanks Universe!

I pay attention to the signs but have trouble thinking about all the small details and intricacies when making decisions. The world around me literally shouts and I only have to listen more closely. So, stop talking and listen, slow down, pay attention, look at the world around you, the signs are everywhere. Or don’t, the choice is up to you. I choose to see the synchronicities of the people I encounter, the animals that cross my path, the traffic jams and obstacles that are put in front of me. They all teach me something about myself and my relationship to the world. What messages has the universe sent you lately? Are you paying attention? Let me know, I would love to hear from you.

Peace and love to all

Donna